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Can I be aware of my delusions?

Posted on: 2018-04-22 20:24:50]

Iíve been having delusions for a long time that people can read my thoughts, and there are cameras everywhere watching me, and that everyone on the street is reporting on me. The problem is, I know these are false so Iím not sure if these are actually delusions. Theyíre not constant, only there most of the time, but because I have some moments without them I have insight into the fact that they are not true. Some separate rational part of my brain knows theyíre not true, even when Iím actively believing them. Even though part of me knows these beliefs are false, if anyone challenges them Iíll insist theyíre true. I still believe them completely, and act and react to thing as though they are real. For instance, something in back of my mind says that obviously people canít read my faults, itís impossible, and Iím just being stupid. But I still believe it enough that when Iím in public I try to clear my mind and block my thoughts, and sometimes put my headphones in and listen to really loud music so when people try to listen to my thoughts they just hear the music. Iíve been told that if youíre aware that youíre delusional or hallucinating then youíre not truly delusional or hallucinating. Is this true? Do these actually sound like delusions that Iím experiencing?
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